Why Me?

Why can't I be the one that...

doesn’t even know when the property taxes are due?

leaves the mayonaise out on the table?

never shuts the car door, garage door, screen door, bathroom door?

just throws my dirty clothes on the floor knowing they will magically be cleaned for me?

doesn’t care if the house is locked at night?

never buys a gift for anyone?

doesn't carry a checkbook, band-aids or chapstick?

sleeps soundly through every single night?

doesn’t know the date or time of any event and yet someone always gets me ready and has me there on time anyway?

Or as Hillary Swank said in "P.S. I Love You":
“Why do I have to be the mature adult who worries? Why can’t I be the cute Irish guy that sings all the time?”

Someday (probably when I'm old and senile) I'll be the cute Irish lady that sings all the time. I can't wait...well I wouldn't mind putting off the senility for a few more years.